Watch Out For Falling Debris
Look out for open manholes, too.

Wednesday, December 22, 2004

Memetics Fix

A fresh catch from the meme pool.
This one's snatched from versuswords' Is It Safe? space.
With SMS consent, of course.

Here goes...

1. What did you do in 2004 that you'd never done before?
Let an art director present my radio scripts.
Err... get a root canal?
And, share the bed with the woman of my dreams.

2. Did you keep your New Years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
Last year's new year's resolution is the same for next year. No more ... nicotine ... Must ... ready ... leather ... straps ...

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Yeah. The same person I share the bed with.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Close call. Aneurysm is almost always fatal. Fortunately, nipped at the bud when he had an encounter with hernia. Im talking about my father.

5. What countries did you visit?
The ones in my dreams. Otherwise, zero.

6. What would you like to have in 2005 that you lacked in 2004?
The root of all evil.

7. What dates from 2004 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
March -- A beautiful wedding. Mine.
April -- resignation after 8 years of living on junk and lies.
August -- Baby Jiro

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Finally embracing the erstwhile dreaded concept of domestication.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Thinking small.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
The common cold is really all too common.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
A miniature christmas lantern, the one you hang on the car's rear view mirror.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
The cab driver who gave me an exact change ...

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Insurgent bastards who hijacked the truck carrying relief goods for typhoon victims

14. Where did most of your money go?
Baby's milk, Baby's diapers and a couple of spiffy Gundam figures now fixed on my shelf.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

16. What song will always remind you of 2004?
D'Sound's People Are People.

17. Compared to this time last year, you are:
Actually working.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Save. Yeah.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Hating politicians. Such a damn waste of energy.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
With family. Lounge on the bed. Til the time comes we pop into gift-wrapper ripping action.

22. Did you fall in love in 2004?
Yep. Married her, too.

23. How many one-night stands?
Dipstick zero.

24. What was your favorite TV program?
Used to be CSI. But I'd stay up late nights for America's Funniest Videos. And as much as I am reluctant to admit it, I actually enjoyed watching Kapuso's Extra Challenge.

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Yeah, the bastard behind Levi's mandatory waistline limit of 34".

26. What was the best book you read?
Peter Mayle's My Life As A Dog had me laughing real hard during lone MRT trips. Other MRT passengers maintain their distance.

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Not a CD album actually, but a store. A bootleg CD shop at Greenhills. Somewhere across Shoppesville. My nocturnal online MP3 and WAV hunts end.

28. What did you want and get?
An exit plan. A crystal clear WAV copy of Tears For Fears' elusive "The Way You Are", an aquarium, real freaky salamanders, Doom 3, Warcraft via Lan. Abarat book 2. A CD/MP3 player, and yes, a couple of spiffy Gundam figures. And cotton candy too.

29. What did you want and not get?
A portable MP3 player. A new digicam. An original WindowsXP for the principled geek in me. The 4-disc LOTR: Return Of The King DVD.

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
Virtual Reality actually tops my list, though hardly Cannes material, I had a real kick with the Incredibles and Shrek 2. Kill Bill volume 2 too, Gogo in absentia, notwithstanding.

31. What did you do on your birthday. And how old were you?
A riotous dinner with the wife. Turned 32.

32.What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
More and longer vacation leaves.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2004?
Paradigm shift. The retro's getting to me. I have two pairs of shoes and shirts my dad would love to wear.

34. What kept you sane?
Catching up on old CSI episodes with the wife.

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Steve Jobs.

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
George Bush re-election.

37. Who did you miss?
A little boy who's been taken away from me. Ouch.

38. Who was the best new person you met?
The new boss. Reminds me why I still work in advertising.

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2004
Smoking is dangerous to your health.

Just Hindu It!

Bollywood inspired Christmas party. Everyone came in Kutra, their turbans, their bindis, their Pashmina, their Hindi best. Someone came as Shiva, four arms, blue skin and half-nekkid. Only to be outdone by a larger-than-life all-styro fashioned elephant god of hedonistic pursuits, Ganesh. An art director uttered this hair-raising one-liner once during a presentation, I borrow it now -- "A cornucopia of colors."

The party title's the title of this blog, courtesy of yours truly.

An art director won the raffle grand prize of P85K in cash. He also won P80K grand prize last year. And the raffle grand prize the year before that. Good karma is such an understatement. Merry Christmas, lucky, lucky bastich.

Tuesday, December 21, 2004

Yuletide Paralysis

Shopaholic dysentry. Ameobic impulse buying pseudoplasts reaching into every corner of Makati where there's a price tag. Inflammation of traffic arteries, side street capilliaries clogged, cerebral palsy time bomb.

Choke point. Inside and out the mall. Shopaholics swarm. One mind. Hive mentality. There is, however, order in the chaos. Everyone moves counter-clockwise. Spurred on by the undearable itch to relieve the excess fat in their suddenly obese backpockets and handbags. There are no muscular peristalsis contractions to regulate the flow of shopaholics. Only desensitized security guards, numbed by sheer numbers of baggages. Entrance and exit diarrhea.

And they say, these are hard times.

MRT. Carting hordes of shopaholics to and fro. One night, one train got bogged down by the weight of shopaholics, now multiplied by two courtesy of Yuletide commerce. MRT, can withstand 90kph gusts of wind, paralyzed by a legion of shopaholics in heat.

This is Makati. Greenhills, on the other hand, is borderline cardiac arrest.

Thursday, December 16, 2004

Anatomical Gag

There's ooze leaking out of your schnooze, drying up upon contact with air. Breathing through a bottle-necked air way. Hands impaired by premature nerves, rendering them useless. You begin to panic. You breath twice as hard, difficulty multiplied twice. You gasp for air, but there are frogs leaping out in a steady cadence through your mouth. You are innocent of the concept of expectoration. You choke as your own physiology does a Gringo Honasan. And there's absolutely nothing you can do. Zilch.


My Baby Jiro is barely 4 months old. Right now, he's weakened and cranky with asthma. Poor guy.

Wednesday, December 15, 2004

Circus Republic

Da King goes belly up from thrombosis, a lethal kin to aneurysim. US of A sends an envoy of sympathy. Flags raised half-mast. Millions across the country mourn. Thousands, bleeding hearts and merely-curious alike, view his remains. Hundreds of automobile side mirrors go missing. Funeral circus. It's true. It's all over the news.

Monday, December 13, 2004


Every company has its micro-culture and codicils to live by. We do. But because life is no longer as clear-cut as bad or good, there are gradations to the area that lie between an idea that can get you fired and the concept that could bowl anyone over.

Right below is the score chart (more like reality check), "borrowed" from a multi-national advertising agency. It hangs on our wall, yeah, just like a noose. 10 gets you a fatter paycheck. Consistently scoring 1 means you should think of an alternative career ... pronto.

The bobo-proof headline reads:

"How's our creative work?"

10 Best in the world bar none
9 New standard in advertising
8 New standard in category
7 Excellence in craft
6 Fresh idea
5 Innovative strategy
4 Cliche
3 Not competitive
2 Destructive
1 Appaling


Honestly, number 2 appeals to me most.

Sunday, December 12, 2004

E=MC squared Week

Slow burn. Quick burn. The week that was. Work. Domestic affairs. And everything else in between.


Google-Head for a week. Been busy doing a major fuzzy science over the company-issued mobile phone. The one with a bad press and an equally bad rep, the mobile phone with Bill Gates all over it. Stuffing it with Jap-inspired jpeg wallpaper files grabbed from Hyung Tae Kim art galleries. Look him up.


The phone is also WAV thirsty. After a week of scouring the net for wave files, it now belches out loud with every SMS message received.

The ringtone is a homage to one of Stanley Kubric's finest: "What's your major malfunction, numbnuts!", an invective sampler from Full Metal Jacket's Drill Instructor Gunnery Sgt. Hartman.


It still hangs a lot though.

Suddenly Monday

Monday happens. Yikes.

Thursday, December 02, 2004

An Obit For Yoyoy

"Here Comes The Sun" playing in a loop. Courtesy of an Art Director enraptured with a storm-free Friday. George Harrison must beaming a wide grin from high above, halo and all. "Here Comes The Sun". Everybody now...

And Then God Sneezed

Rain drops sideways. Left to right. Rendering hooded rain coats useless. Umbrellas vanish into the air. Storm signal number 4, incoming. Makati holds its breath. Skirts fly, men trip. Work stops. Cab drivers call it a day 2 hours before six. AM stations on every tuner. Local TV news channels get higher ratings. The train quits. Trees undergo labor-free trimming. Those with weaker constitutions, return to nature ASAP. Crikets take the night off. The white leghorn in the backyard go silent.

All because a butterfly flapped its wings at the other side of the globe. Chaos theory are for the seriously fucked up.

In times like these, they should ... watch out for falling debris.

Wednesday, December 01, 2004

Pause, Play, Fast Forward

Crystal Method's "Born Too Slow", and highway traffic jam, really baaaad combination.

Enigma's first album, any track, a can of beer (one for the road, now ain't that a myth), a stretch of wide road that goes on for miles, plus an evening cruise at a steady speed of 80 kph, ideal.

For city driving that's marked by tight roads with a dozen mind-numbing turns (Makati's labyrinthine traffic zoning, you get the picture), my reco goes to N.E.R.D. Mooosik el magnifique!

If you happen to be driving a sedan, any, and there really is no rush to reach destination Point B, slip in your CD copy of Black Eyed Peas in your in-dash CD player, set volume to 20 tops, forget the clutch, never the brakes. And the red lights, too.

Listening satisfaction guaranteed.

Femme Fatality

Violeta. Winnie. Both came and went, homewreckers, heartbreakers, the latter leaving three hundred and forty dead in her wake. Wake. Vigilance and prayers for the dead. Saw a front cover picture that dramatically captured the aftermath of her passing, a concrete bridge halved right in the middle, rising above a mud and detritus choked river, huge trunks of trees hugging the base. Reminded me of a scene in Dante's Peak. But this ain't no Hollywood CG. Reality is still much, much scarier.

0.01% ME

Is It November Already?
Now, Isn't She A Beauty
So, What's New?
Goblins, Rascals, Every Single One Of Them
The Anatomy Of A Rant
Spamblogger, A Word Or Two...
Garlic, All Is Not Lost.
Gaiman versus Caiman
Busy ... Busy ... Busy ...

September 2004
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Compulsive Eater
Heres My Kokote
Is It Safe?
Johanne Paulus
Noise Pollution
Something To Sing About
Streaks Of Light

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Warren Ellis
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My Boyfriend Is A Twat
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